Thursday, September 16, 2021

ANALYSIS: Terry McAuliffe Looks, Dances Like Old Lesbian

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Former governor Terry McAuliffe (D., Va.) looks and dances like an old lesbian, a Washington Free Beacon analysis has determined.

McAuliffe, the Democratic nominee to replace Gov. Ralph “Blackface” Northam (D., Va.), has attempted to make a schtick of his awkward dancing on the campaign trail. In doing so, he has succeeded in capturing the vibe of prominent old lesbian Ellen DeGeneres.

Further investigation uncovered additional similarities between the seemingly disparate public figures. Born almost exactly one year apart, McAuliffe and DeGeneres appear to share a physical resemblance.

They both enjoy taking selfies with large groups of weirdos.

And they both enjoy hanging with Hillary Clinton, who most experts agree is the least likable politician in American history.

It remains to be seen whether these findings will be of any significance to the Virginia gubernatorial election, which takes place in November of this year. Rest assured, the Free Beacon will continue to monitor this developing story.

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